Finding Love

We’re all seeking that special person who is right for us. But if you’ve been through enough relationships, you begin to suspect there’s no right person, just different flavors of wrong. Why is this? Because you yourself are wrong in some way, and you seek out partners who are wrong in some complementary way. But it takes a lot of living to grow fully into your own wrongness. And it isn’t until you finally run up against your deepest demons, your unsolvable problems—the ones that make you truly who you are—that we’re ready to find a lifelong mate. Only then do you finally know what you’re looking for. You’re looking for the wrong person. But not just any wrong person: the right wrong person—someone you lovingly gaze upon and think, “This is the problem I want to have.”

I will find that special person who is wrong for me in just the right way.

Let our scars fall in love.
― Galway Kinnell

When we find that someone, we start to see a bigger picture and realize vague things.  Accidents find meaning. Complexity brings peace. Everything falls just into the right place. It does not seem to matter any more if those scars we have hidden for years are seen. Certainty in acceptance ends life-long fear of vulnerability.  We find happiness and beauty in it. With just one, the universe seems to go in the same flow with us. For once, we can attest that there is after all heaven in earth.